>
>1. I Have Absolutely No Idea Where My Purse Is.
>
>2. I Believe That Dancing With My Arms Overhead And Wiggling My Butt
>while Yelling "woo-hoo!" Is Truly The Sexiest Dance Move Around
>
>3. I've Suddenly Decided I Want To Kick Someone's *** And Honestly
>believe I Could Do It Too.
>
>4. In My Last Trip To Pee, I Realize I Now I Look More Like A Homeless
>hooker Than The Goddess I Was Just Four Hours Ago.
>
>5. I Drop My 3:00 A.m. Submarine Sandwhich On The Floor (which I'm
>eating Even Though I'm Not The Least Bit Hungry), Pick It Up And Carry
>on Eating It.
>
>6. I Start Crying And Telling Everyone I See That I Love Them Sooooo
>much.
>
>7. I Get Extremely Excited And Jump Up And Down Every Time A New Song
>plays Because "oh My God! I Love This Song!"
>
>8. I've Found A Deeper/spiritual Side To The Geek Sitting Next To Me.
>
>9. The Man I'm Flirting With Used To Be My 5th Grade Teacher.
>
>10. The Urge To Take Off Articles Of Clothing, Stand On A Table And Sing
>or Dance Becomes Strangely Overwhelming.
>
>11. My Eyes Just Don't Seem To Want To Stay Open On Their Own So I Keep
>them Half Closed And Think It Looks Exotically Sexy.
>
>12. I've Suddenly Taken Up Smoking And Become Really Good At It.
>
>13. I Yell At The Bartender, Who (i Think) Cheated Me By Giving Me Just
>lemonade, But That's Just Because I Can No Longer Taste The Gin.
>
>14. I Think I'm In Bed, But My Pillow Feels Strangely Like The Kitchen
>floor
>
>15. I Start Every Conversation With A Booming, "don't Take This The
>wrong Way But..."
>
>16. I Fail To Notice That The Toilet Lid's Down When I Sit On It.
>
>17. My Hugs Begin To Resemble Wrestling Take-down Moves.
>
>18. I'm Tired So I Just Sit On The Floor (wherever I Happen To Be
>standing) And Take A Quick Nap.
>
>19. I Begin Leaving The Buttons Open On My Button Fly Pants To Cutdown
>on The Time I'm In The Bathroom Away From My Drink.
>
>20. I Take My Shoes Off Because I Believe It's Their Fault That I'm
>having Problems Walking Straight.
>
>
>send This Along To All The Girls You Know Who Like To Have Fun. Make
>them Laugh At Themselves Like You Probably Did... Sadly, Many Are True.
>life
>is What You Make Of It...kind Of Like Playdough